Siri Tachi's Journal What I Wish You Knew
by alaskangirl10
Summary: ObiWan Kenobi finds a former Jedi's diary and finds somethings he never knew about her.


Obi-Wan Kenobi had thirteen year old Anakin as his Padawan. He walked the halls of the temple. He was thinking about how all those years ago Siri Tachi had gone on those missions with him. He was walking past the Padawans' rooms. He looked at the room the Siri had lived in. That is before she left the the Jedi order. He stopped in front of her door. Siri was no longer was a Jedi. The Padawan that lived there now was Hope. Hope was turning thirteen in a week. _Should I go in there?_ He asked himself. He knew that he had to do, it would put his mind to rest. He knocked at the door. A red headed girl answered the door. "Hi, Master Obi-Wan!" she said. Hope had the prettiest red hair and green eyes anyone had ever seen. She reminded him of Cerasi. "Hope, you wouldn't mind if I took a look around your room would you?" Obi-Wan asked. "No," Hope said making room for him to walk in. Hope picked up a book and began to read. Obi-Wan shuffled around. He didn't know what he was looking for, just something of Siri's. Then he noticed what Hope was reading. It didn't look like a book she would get from the library. "What is that your reading?" he asked. "Oh I found it under the bed and I think it's a journal or log of some sort," Hope said looking up from the book. "Can you read the first entry?" he asked. She nodded.

Dear Diary,

Here begins the diary of Siri Tachi. On this early Monday morn. I am a Jedi Padawan! My master is Adi Gallia! I think she is the best master for me. I am extremely good at fighting! And my master is the one that gave me this diary. Me and the annoying one, Obi-Wan are to go to Kegan on a mission and I think it is a total blow. This mission is going to be boring! Master Yoda thinks we should learn to work together. Yea like that's ever going to happen! Oh sorry, Adi is calling me I'll write more later.

Obi-Wan looked at Hope. Hope looked up and asked, "Do you want me to read more?" "Yes, Hope please do," he said.

Later the same day

Wow! Tomorrow Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, Adi Gallia, and I will be leaving in the morning. Master Yoda retold us. I'm tired of listening about this! I mean We'll go to Kegan see if this kid is Force sensitive or not. It's not a big deal! Let it be known that Obi-Wan Kenobi is very, very annoying! If I had one whish it would be that it would be just me and Master Adi Gallia going on this mission, no Obi-Wan, no Qui-Gon, no one but me and My master! Ergggggg! Master Adi is calling now I don't need to practice with Obi-Wan! I hate him! I hate him! Once again I Siri Tachi hate Obi-Wan Kenobi!

Dear Diary,

I'm so sorry that I've neglected you for two days! I tried writing last night but whatever I wrote looked like Yoda wrote it with his claw then someone walked over it. I'm on Kegan. Well really I'm still on the ship. Which has landed. Adi Gallia is looking over my shoulder I'm pretending not to notice. I'm going to put you in my secret pocket in my shirt. I promise to write every day! I swear!

Later that day,

We checked out the kid and she is Force sensitive. O-Lana is her name. But there is something seriously wrong on this planet. I know it! I just know it. The way the people look and act. There is no singing and no children, no monuments, nothing but eerie smiles! This is seriously wrong! Oh we are going in to town now, write more later.

Dear Diary,

I knew there was something seriously wrong on this planet. Our masters, Obi-Wan and mine, wanted us to sneak away from them. I wanted to stay and see what was going down. But they shooed us away. And as a result we were captured and brought to a school. So this is were the kids are. Can you believe that we were captured! It's all Qui-Gon's fault! If we'd been with him we would not be here!

Dear Diary,

I was mouthing off today, the teacher gives us penalty marks. They are way stupid! I was thinking back to the day that Bruck had dared me to get a hair from Master Yoda's head! Bruck got in trouble, but I didn't! Ok here is the story. I hadn't been picked by Adi as a Padawan. And Bruck told me that the Masters only picked brave Padawans. So he said that I had to prove that I was not a little girl by proving that I was brave, and so he gave me a test. That is why I had to get a hair from Yoda's head. Obi-Wan tried to talk me out of it, but I being stubborn didn't listen. Any way I had this plan to cut a hair from Yoda while he was sleeping. And of course everything went downwards from there. Yoda woke up and scolded me. But good news is Bruck got caught out of his room and was sentenced to two days in the meditation room. Oh I'm getting tiered got to go!

Later that night,

I was thinking about my past and I realized something. I remember my family, I guess I never really thought about it. I remember my mother's unturned and beautiful face, my brothers' playful gaze, and my father's laughter. I remember my mother singing to me, a song that I sing to myself every night. I don't even think about it. I remember a few lines : "I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance. Never settle for the path of least resistance Living might mean taking chances But they're worth taking Lovin' might be a mistake But it's worth making Don't let some hell bent heart Leave you bitter When you come close to selling out Reconsider Give the heavens above More than just a passing glance, and when you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance." I don't know why I remember those lines. I just do. Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth making. Those words stand out among the rest.

Dear Diary,

I was stuck with Obi-Wan all day today and the teacher has a strange way of punishment. We had to clean all the dishes for that night. We also met a nine year old boy, Davi. He has a pet bird, he's so cute (the bird)! I love animals! But I don't tell anyone, because I act like a tough girl, when really I love animals and I hate hiding who I am. I some times question the Jedi code. Why can't Jedi fall in love? What's so wrong with it? It wouldn't distract me at all! I have a strange felling. It feels like I'm as light as a feather. And when I try to talk to Obi-Wan I can't. Oh Obi-Wan is calling me can't hide and writ forever!

Later midnight!

I now know what that feeling was… love. I love, I can't believe I'm saying this but, I love Obi-Wan Kenobi! That's right! I love him! I don't know why it happened. I don't know how it happened. But it happened. Love is forbidden for a Jedi! The code forbids it. The council forbids it. My master forbids it. My instincts forbid it. But my heart says different. I can't look at him, for fear that he may know. I want to tell him, but words don't, can't explain how I feel. Instead of telling him I mock him! Why dose my cruel ways torture my heart? My master must never know, Qui-Gon must never know! Obi-Wan must never know. This will be my secret, I will love him from afar. I will cherish every moment I spend with him. He brought the best out of me and as did I. We brought the best out in each other. I wonder dose he love me? Dose he hate me is this just some stupid preteen crush or true love? Maybe I should ask Tahl or Seri or Sari or Sybil or… No! I can't tell any one! Maybe when I'm ready I'll tell Obi-Wan, but until then I Siri Tachi must not say a word. I must go now I need some time to think.

Hope looked up at Obi-Wan with big eyes. "She, she…" Hope could not finish. Obi-Wan was expecting this. Because Obi-Wan had felt the same towards her. He loved her. And she loved him, but love was forbidden. "Master Obi-Wan do you want to me to read more?" Hope asked. "No. I know who would want to read this," Obi-Wan said. He reached for the book. Hope looked down at it. Then handed the book to him. "You want to read this?" He asked raising an eyebrow at her. Hope looked up and nodded. "After Adi Gallia reads it I'll give it back to you. "Thanks!" Hope said smiling. "It leaves me in suspense!" Obi-Wan left. He walked to the council meeting room. "Master Adi Gallia, I have something you may find interesting," he said handing her the diary. "This was Siri's." Adi took it and held it in her hands. "I did not read all of it, but it will amaze you" Adi looked up. "Master Yoda thinks I should take in another Padawan. Whom do you think I should take in?" Adi asked the Jedi knight. Obi-Wan thought for a moment. "Why not Hope? She is kina of like Siri," he said. Adi looked up. "Maybe," she said. "Maybe."


End file.
